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Trần Ngọc Thịnh | Knowledge Link Group –

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Category Archives: Funny Story

Big Fans – Thu 6, ngay 6 thang 6 nam 2008

05 Thứ Năm Tháng 6 2008

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 4 phản hồi

Thẻ

life, love, work

Thank you so much for your love

I love you, too

I mean all of you – my big fans

Humorous English Conversation – May 29, 2008

28 Thứ Tư Tháng 5 2008

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 3 phản hồi

Thẻ

funny

These days are hot, extremely hot, so I had a “hot” and “sexy” barbecue on my motorbike. So to make these days cooler , enjoy these humorous conversations.

TNT July 28

—-

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan ?
Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan !
Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this?
Caller : I’m Sam Wan . And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It’s urgent.
Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what’s this urgent matter about?
Caller: Well… just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
Operator : Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn’t an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don’t have time for this!
Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator: I’m Saw Ree.

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry . Now give me your name!!
Operator: That’s what I said. I’m Saw Ree ..
Caller: O h ……God!!! !
TNT July 28: Hey, someone called me! I am God here! How can I help you? Let’s me post this conversation on my blog!
——–

Wedding Deal

Father : “I want you to marry a girl of my choice”
Son : “I will choose my own bride!”
Father: “But the girl is Bill Gates”s daughter.”
Son : “Well, in that case…ok”

Next Father approaches Bill Gates.

Father: “I have a husband for your daughter.”
Bill Gates: “But my daughter is too young to marry!”
Father: “But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank.”
Bill Gates: “Ah, in that case…ok”

Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Father: “I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president.”
President: “But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!”
Father: “But this young man is Bill Gates”s son-in-law.”
President: “Ah, in that case…ok”

It’s so funny wedding deal. I will take it to negotiate for my wedding. Do you want to marry a daughter of a very rich man. Take it as a big lesson!

Scary Story – May 26, 2008

26 Thứ Hai Tháng 5 2008

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 2 phản hồi

Thẻ

funny

Let me tell you my scary story. I met a girl in a dancing floor. She was wearing a Lacoste T-shirt. She looked at me as if she was going to eat me. I am so scared! She approached me and start our conversation. I don’t know her name, but I call her “Crocodile” because she was such an “extremely beautiful” girl with a Lacoste T-shirt. She is a real crocodile I think. Here was our conversation:

Real Crocodile: Hi!
TNT July 28: Hi, do I know you?
Real Crocodile: No, I think but we will
TNT July 28: Will?
Real Crocodile: Actually, I did look at your pictures and found that you look a lot like somebody?
TNT July 28: Who?
Real Crocodile: My next boyfriend…
TNT July 28: I think you look likes my ex-girlfriend!
……..
…………

Real Crocodile: Say you love me! Say you love me!
TNT July 28: You love me…
…
Real Crocodile: If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
TNT July 28: Sure, what’s your phone number??
…
Real Crocodile: I think the poorest people are the happiest.
TNT July 28: Then marry me and we’ll be the happiest couple
…..
Real Crocodile: Hey you, I want to dance with you like this forever.
TNT July 28: Don’t you ever want to improve your dance? My foot is extremely hurt!

After that conversation, I run away as if I was chased by a ghost. Poor my shoes, I lost it!

English Funny Conversation – May 23, 2008

22 Thứ Năm Tháng 5 2008

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 13 phản hồi

Thẻ

funny

Đợt này công việc đang vào giai đoạn căng thẳng, nhưng mình cảm thấy vui vì tối đến về nhà xem một đống phim hoạt hình và phim hài. Tối qua xem bộ phim Rush Hour 3 với Thành Long, buồn cười nhất là đoạn hội thoại thanh tra da đen Carter gặp 1 võ sư già Trung Quốc mù và trợ lý của ông ta.

Carter: What’s your name?
Old man: I am Yu
Carter: Ok, I repeat this damn question, who are you?
Old man: I said I am Yu
Carter: Hey, are you deaf?
Old man: No, Yu is blind.
Carter: What, I am not blind. Ok

Quán ngán ngẩm Carter quay sang chỉ người trợ lý của ông già mù và nói:

Carter: Hey, you
Old man: Yes,
Carter: No, I said you, what’s your name?
Assistant: Me? I am Mi
Carter: Oh, fucking that
Old man: He said He is Mi! I am Yu.

Ôi, cười vỡ bụng vì mấy đoạn hội thoại này! Post thêm một đoạn hội thoại vui nữa giữa TNT July 28 và 1 little girl trong clip “My English Tutor”.

Little girl: Em đố Anh What là cái gì.?
TNT July 28 trả lời: What là cái gì…!
Little girl mới bảo: Em hỏi Anh What là cái gì.? Sao Anh không trả lời mà lại hỏi Em what là cái gì.?
TNT July 28 : Thì What là cái gì.
Little girl: Ờ … thì…… what là cái gì
TNT July 28: Vậy Em hỏi lại Anh nè. Tại sao là why.?
Little girl: Thì….. bởi vì là why.
TNT July 28: Vậy là Anh nói sai rồi. Bởi vì là because.!

Wanna more:

Trong một khách sạn ở London. Có tiếng chuông reo ở quầy tiếp tân. Nhân viên phục vụ nhấc máy và nghe có tiếng nguời nói: – Tu ti tu tu tu tu! Anh này chẳng hiểu đầu dây kia nói gì, bèn dập máy. Lại có tiếng chuông reo, và vẫn câu nói ấy: – Tu ti tu tu tu tu! Nhân viên phục vụ lại dập máy. Lại có tiếng chuông reo, và lần này vẫn lại đúng câu ấy: – Tu ti tu tu tu tu! Nhân viên phục vụ tức điên người, dập máy rõ mạnh. Vài phút sau, một anh chàng xuất hiện ngay truớc mắt nhân viên phục vụ, quát lên: – Này ông kia, ông có hiểu tiếng Anh không hả? Tôi đã nói 3 lần rồi: “Mang ngay 2 ly trà vào phòng 222″.

Here is the conversation between George Bush – President and Codoliza Rice

Washington DC., November 2004 (Sound of intercom buzzing)
(Remote voice) Mr. President, Condoleezza Rice is here to see you.

President Bush: Good! Send her in.
(Remote voice) Yes sir!
(Sound of door opening)
Codoliza Rice: Good morning, Mr. President.
(Sound of door closing)
President Bush: Oh Condoleezza, nice to see you, what’s happening?
Codoliza Rice: Well, Mr. President, I have the report here about the new leader in China.
President Bush: Right Conda, lay it on me.
Codoliza Rice: Mr. President, Hu is the new leader of China.
President Bush: Well, that’s what I want to know.
Codoliza Rice: Well, that’s what I am telling you, Mr. President,
President Bush: Well, that’s what I am asking you Condi, who is the new leader of China.
Codoliza Rice: Yes!
President Bush: I mean the fellow’s name.
Codoliza Rice: Hu.
President Bush: The guy in China.
Codoliza Rice: Hu.
President Bush: The new leader of China.
Codoliza Rice: Hu.
President Bush: The Chinaman.
Codoliza Rice: Hu is leading China, Mr. President
President Bush: What are you asking me for?
Codoliza Rice: I am telling you, Hu is leading China.
President Bush: Well, I am asking you Condi, who is leading China?
Codoliza Rice: That’s the man’s name.
President Bush: That’s whose name?
Codoliza Rice: Yes.
President Bush: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader in China?
Codoliza Rice: Yessir!
President Bush: Yasir? Yasir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Codoliza Rice: That’s correct, sir.
President Bush: Then who is in China?
Codoliza Rice: Yes sir.
President Bush: Yasir is in China?
Codoliza Rice: No sir.
President Bush: Then who is?
Codoliza Rice: Yes sir.
President Bush: Yasir?
Codoliza Rice: No sir.

(Moment’s pause)

President Bush: Condi, you are starting to tick me off now. That’s not because you are black either. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. So why don’t you get me the Secretary-General of the United Nations on the phone.
Codoliza Rice: Kofi Annan?
President Bush: No thanks; and Condi, call me George. Stop with that Ebonics crap.
Codoliza Rice: You want Kofi?
President Bush: No.
Codoliza Rice: You don’t want Kofi?
President Bush: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk, and then get me the UN.
Codoliza Rice: Yes sir!
President Bush: Not Yasir, the guy at the United Nations.
Codoliza Rice: Kofi!
President Bush: Milk! Will you please make that call?
Codoliza Rice: And call who?
President Bush: Well, who is the guy at the UN?
Codoliza Rice: No, Hu is the guy in China.
President Bush: Will you stay out of China?
Codoliza Rice: Yes sir!
President Bush: And stay out of the Middle East. Just get me the guy at the UN.
Codoliza Rice: Kofi.
President Bush: All right! With cream and two sugars… now get on the phone.
(Phone dialling)
Codoliza Rice: Hello! Rice here!
President Bush: Rice? Good idea, and get a couple of egg-rolls too, Condi, maybe we should send some to the guy in China, and the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

Cuộc sống thì làm sao tránh khỏi những lúc mệt mỏi, căng thẳng, buồn rầu. Những lúc như vậy hãy làm những điều sau đây (lời khuyên của TNT July 28):

  1. Xem một hoặc một vài bộ phim hài, cười thật to
  2. Nghe nhạc thật to những bài hát yêu thích
  3. Tìm một người bạn để chia sẻ
  4. Đi ngủ, ngủ thật say, nếu khó ngủ thì đi chơi cho thật mệt rồi về ngủ.
  5. Viết blog để giải tỏa
  6. Khóc thật to để giải tỏa nỗi lòng
  7. Ngâm mình trong nhà tắm
  8. Lên bar, uống rượu sau đó shake trong tiếng nhạc ầm ĩ (đừng chơi thuốc lắc nhé )
  9. Tạm thời vứt hết tất cả về với gia đình.
  10. Luôn tin rằng mọi chuyện rồi sẽ ổn!

Một nụ cười bằng mười thang thuốc bổ

Conversation – May 22, 2008

21 Thứ Tư Tháng 5 2008

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 1 phản hồi

Thẻ

funny

TNT July 28: Hi
Little girl: Hi, who are you?
TNT July 28: I don’t know
Little girl: What’s your name?
TNT July 28: I am God
Little girl: God?
TNT July 28: yeah
Little girl: How do you find me?
TNT July 28: Oh, it’s easy. I am God. I know everyone.
….
…..
…….
Little girl: Do you have a Girl Friend?
TNT July 28: Of course, many
Little girl: Many?
TNT July 28: Yes, God loves all people. All people love God.
Little girl: But I want my only God
TNT July 28: You are so selfish. God is for everyone.
Little girl: Oh my God!
TNT July 28: I am here.

Sweet dream or Nightmare — January 15, 2008

15 Thứ Ba Tháng 1 2008

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 14 phản hồi

Thẻ

funny

Sweet dream or Nightmare!

I don’t know! I dreamed that I got married with a girl. Unfortunately, I didn’t remember her face. How did she look like? I didn’t care. But the most important thing in that dream, when I looked at my finger on left hand, I found a ring on that. I tried to put it out, but I couldn’t. I felt as I was put in prison, hehe.

Suddenly, I woke up and found that my finger did not have any rings. Oh my God! Thank you for saving my freedom. I only need love, not marriage now. I am still too young to get married but matured enough to be in love.

My daughter – August 20, 2007

19 Chủ Nhật Tháng 8 2007

Posted by TNT July 28 in Funny Story, Written in English

≈ 14 phản hồi

Thẻ

family, love

Suddenly, I found that I have a daughter even I don’t know who her mother is. I am proud of my daughter because she is cute, smart, glib and lovely. You know why, just because she is my daughter who inherits these characteristics from me. It is difficult for me – a busy and young father but I still spend my spare time to take care of her. I always watch her progress from a distance.

Thank you – my dear daughter for your time with me. I wish you all the best.

Your young dad,

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